spare glove


"Chaps, chaps, my sweetie pie just ripped of my arm, ouch, oh very ouch."
"By joe, d'you need a plaster?"
"It should just heal itself old chap."
"Top hat?"


yorkshire balls




I loved those damn golf balls, why did they take down my United States Missile Defence system and put up another less attractive more effective system. Oh, ok.

bear mansion


The bear necessities n maybe a fountain, a few spires, some modest arches but only one front pruned, landscaped  8 acre garden. And a private road.

shirt bear


"You working?"  
"Maybe baby, whatdya want?"
"A shirt for this collar and buttons."

HESSIAN ISLAND


Tuesdays on Hessian Island

globe bears


"You looking at our Globe? You wanna stop looking?  If you don't stop, right, get that bald bastard." 

indiana charles


 Even if they killed the bad guy and put the gun is his hand, people would still think. 
You're fuckin kidding me, him

gladis cooper




Gladis Cooper, dreamy but a bit creased by now.

Womb cannon




Like shooting cherubs from a womb cannon

flower betting


Secret, men only, flower betting.

he aint seen me


"Y'know what? I'm proper full up. I'm just follow this one until he shits zig zags."

the ride


What a ride.

mr majeka


Mr Majeka sometimes shits on the beach, so what, you're still looking.

Teddykins


"So you little shit, you think old yellow teddykins was playing around didn't ya, huh? Well Martin don't.  We're gonna stuff this son of a bitch so tight he's gonna bleed mixed fibres if you don't get me that golden eye, you hear me!?"